[esphome] Fix OTA backend abort not being called on error (#13182)

esphome/components/esphome/ota/ota_esphome.cpp

@@ -395,12 +395,14 @@ void ESPHomeOTAComponent::handle_data_() {
 
 error:
   this->write_byte_(static_cast<uint8_t>(error_code));
-  this->cleanup_connection_();
 
+  // Abort backend before cleanup - cleanup_connection_() destroys the backend
   if (this->backend_ != nullptr && update_started) {
     this->backend_->abort();
   }
 
+  this->cleanup_connection_();
+
   this->status_momentary_error("err", 5000);
 #ifdef USE_OTA_STATE_CALLBACK
   this->state_callback_.call(ota::OTA_ERROR, 0.0f, static_cast<uint8_t>(error_code));